Notes from the Road

I'm in Boulder -- and too busy so far to post much (or at all) -- but I wanted to throw something up, if only to assure the two or three people who check this site don't think it's abandoned. A few notes from the road trip out:

--Podcasts are my new favorite invention, and the primary reason I made it to Boulder with my sanity intact. Funny, engaging and informative segments from the likes of ESPN, NPR, and The Onion was all I needed -- very little music (though I had a bunch at the ready) and local radio were almost completely unnecessary.

--As I crossed into Nevada, an automatic camera snapped my photo, like the traffic cameras positioned all over LA to catch people who run red lights. This brought back the unpleasant memories of the cameras catching me running the a red light near my house -- twice.

--The next thing I came to, just across the Nevada border, were the state line casinos -- including "Terrible's Casino and Resort". At first, I thought this was a terrible name for a casino (pun intended), but as I was telling my third friend about it, I realized it might just be terrible like a fox. Or something.

--Utah is filled with extremely polite folks, though possibly inbred.

-- Colorado is even more beautiful than I remember. Seeing the sky, I wonder why it looks so blue. Why the clouds seem so white, and puffy, and perfect. Don't they have blue skies in LA? Aren't there clouds? The answer is that LA does indeed have them, but us residents there are forced to view them through a screen door of smog which dulls them to our senses. Here, everything is crisp and clear, and larger than life -- as if being seen for the very first time.

--The people in Boulder are also a huge improvement over LA people, although the same thing could be said for pond scum, so take that for what it's worth. People smile, everybody you pass on the street says, "Hi", and every time you go out to a bar or restaurant you end up striking up a conversation with someone. I don't know if Colorado holds a better life for me, but I know it's a more pleasant life.

I hope to get up a post on the Oscar noms soon, and maybe even one on 'Slumdog Millionaire', which I finally saw, and how it figures into my Top 10 list. But this blog is lower on my list priorities than it has been recently, what with the screenwriting, a new job, a new home (maybe?), and seeing old friends on the agenda. So we'll see. I know you're waiting with baited breath.

Link Dump

So, I mentioned in my Top 10 list of movies from '08 that I hadn't yet seen 'Slumdog Millionaire'. It's quickly ascended to the top of the Oscar candidates, but I haven't even tried to see it, because I've heard a couple of takes on it, and am pretty sure I'd hate it. I know, everybody's raving about it -- it's the feel-good, heartwarming, tear-jerking, blah, blah, blah -- but from the sound of the plot, and a description of the storytelling techniques, I knew it wasn't my cup of tea. That's why I didn't feel bad making my Top 10 list without seeing the movie likely to walk away with "Best Picture".

That original take was only solidified when I read Film Drunk's review today, which basically says everything I'd heard, imagined, and feared about the movie. It outlines some specific issues I already had with the movie, the general feeling of absurdity, cliche, and self-satisfaction I expected, and even a couple more weaknesses I hadn't heard of/imagined. I'll probably see the movie eventually -- I'll be in Boulder soon, without much to do, and have already seen all the good movies coming out across the country this month -- but more out of morbid curiosity than eagerness.

Today, Film Drunk also posted review of 'The Wrestler, making me feel bad I didn't call it the best film of the year, which it just might be. Every time I read another review of it, I'm again amazed to think about how great Mickey Rourke's performance was. If he doesn't win the Oscar, I hope he puts whoever does in a Figure Four Leglock a la Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake.

While were talking about movies and dropping links, here's Rotten Tomatoes' Top 10 Sci-Fi Flicks for the Thinking Man. Some good ones on this list, including a couple you don't hear talked about much -- 'Gattaca' and 'Primer' -- along with the more usual suspects -- 'Children of Men' and 'Blade Runner'.

Lastly, I'm headed off to Boulder early next week, so the posting may not be too regular for a while. We'll see how it goes, but I'll be juggling a job, the completion of the script I'm working on, and my football column (at least through the Super Bowl), all while staying at a friend's place, so it could be spotty at best. Then again, I may have to get online to rant about driving cross-country (well, halfway across anyway), or living in snow, or how nice the people outside of LA are, so you never know.

Right now, the biggest issue is that I can't find my favorite album -- Radiohead's 'The Bends' -- for the road trip. I've uploaded all my other CD's to iTunes (finally joining the 21st century), but can't find it anywhere. Was it stolen? Lost? Taken by CD fairies? Did I loan it to someone? I can't make it 1,000 miles on the open road without it, so if I lent it to you, this is the time to return it. My sanity is at stake.

That's it for now. See you when I see you.

Navel Gazing: LA Story

This is where I over-share about my life, spilling all my thoughts, ideas, fears, and aspirations onto the page for everyone to see. Like you even care.

When I was in college at Boston University, I took a job as the Sports Information Director at the Wentworth Institute of Technology. I was badly overmatched at the job, which required more time than a full-time student like myself could give. I left after a semester, but not before I came across something I would keep close to my heart for the next 17 years and counting.

It was tacked to a wall in the Athletic Department, a white piece of paper with some printing on it. I have no idea who placed it there -– it didn't belong among the sweaty men and locker room talk. This is what it read:

IF I HAD MY LIFE TO LIVE OVER

I'd dare to make more mistakes next time. I'd relax, I would limber up. I would be sillier than I have been this trip. I would take fewer things seriously. I would take more chances.I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers. I would eat more ice cream and less beans. I would perhaps have more actual troubles, but I'd have fewer imaginary ones.

You see, I'm one of those people who live sensibly and sanely hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I've had my moments, And if I had it to do over again, I'd have more of them. In fact, I'd try to have nothing else. Just moments, one after another, instead of living so many years ahead of each day.I've been one of those people who never goes anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, a raincoat and a parachute. If I had to do it again, I would travel lighter than I have.

If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry-go-rounds. I would pick more daisies.

Nadine Stair
Louisville, Kentucky
85 years old

I photocopied that sheet of paper, and have kept the increasingly tattered copy with me -– tacked to walls in my workplace, taped to a bookshelf next to my desk at home – and looked to it often for inspiration. I even used it to explain a number of life decisions -– the choice to leave multiple jobs, even as a reason to move to LA from Boulder, CO. But like any great quote, or philosophy, or advice, it eventually loses the rush of understanding that once accompanied it and sinks back into the background. Even epiphanies whither on the vine.

You get lulled into some kind of haze, in which you seem to be wearing blinders. You focus on just what’s in front of you, and you lose sight of where you are in the big picture. Like a castaway adrift in a lifeboat, the scenery still looks the same, but you’ve drifted so far off course, you can never get back. This is how marriages are ruined, how people become stuck in professions they hate, why mid-life crises happen.

This is exactly what was happening to me until recently. I was so concerned with making it as a screenwriter, I failed to notice this pursuit was making me miserable. It’s not the writing, per se. I still love to write –- the rush of inspiration, the challenge of development, the thrill of executing an idea –- it’s everything which had surrounded it that was making me miserable.

You see, to achieve my goal –- making a living wage as a screenwriter -– I had to cozy up to several unattractive propositions: living in LA*, employing agents and managers with whom I didn’t necessarily see eye-to-eye, working with any producer who’d pay (or even promise to), etc. Kowtowing to these ugly realities slowly ate away at my soul, and I only realized when it started to kill my joy for writing. In addition, the money from our pitch sale is running out, and I’ve been unable to find a good job (due in most part to the fact I haven’t had a “real” job in about 10 years). My wife and I want to start a family eventually, but since you need a stable income for something like that, we seemed to be drifting further and further from that goal.

That’s when I realized: I don’t even need to be in LA to write anymore. With all the progress made in communicating via the Internet -- e-mail, IM, teleconferencing, Scipe, even a screenwriting program which allows two people to work on the same document simultaneously –- I could be a screenwriter from anywhere. When I first came out, it was a necessity -– I didn’t know anyone in Hollywood, and more importantly, they didn’t know me. But I’ve made my connections in town, I rarely go to many meetings anymore (and could always do them by phone in a pinch), and I’ve established myself (at least a bit) by selling a pitch. My writing partner, Barry, will still live here, in case any face-to-face work must be done in town. So what’s really keeping me here?

That realization excited me, and when I found out an old friend in Boulder had a job waiting for me if I wanted it, that excitement grew. My decision (along with my wife, of course) to move back to Boulder felt incredibly freeing. So was firing our managers, who were making the development/writing process a living hell. Once I freed myself from these uncomfortable constraints, the inspiration returned. And the ticking clock -– knowing I’ll only be here to work with Barry in person until early next year -– lends needed urgency to our current script, a project we’re both passionate about (but have been putting off for too long in order to write more commercial material).

I know that by moving, I may close doors which held opportunities in show business, but sometimes in life you need to make a change, and sometimes that change includes a shuffling of priorities. I still hope to keep writing in Boulder and eventually “make it” as a screenwriter, but I’m not willing to put my life on hold any longer to achieve that goal. At this moment, my dreams of having a family, my mental health, and my (and my wife's) overall happiness all have to trump any career strategy.

Right now, it’s time to ride some merry-go-rounds and pick some daisies.

* When a friend recently asked me the reasons why I'd prefer living in Boulder to living in LA, this is what I came up with off the top of my head:
--No traffic
--No smog
--No road rage
--No high speed car chases
--No pretense/attitude/douchebags
--Easier to meet people, make friends
--No lines at movie theaters/restaurants/bars
--Much more fun/less exclusive night scene
--More parking (doesn't sound like a big deal until you live here)
--More beautiful scenery
--Better/older friends already out there (2 best friends from college)
--No police helicopters circling above our apartment all through the night every Fri/Sat
--No long commutes to work (both our commutes are 30+ min. even though we work in completely opposite directions), errands, and friends (I have friends I don't see just because they live too far away)
--Less taxes (here I had to pay to become a small business so I could work as a writer)
--Less psychos/crime: Just in the last few weeks, a SWAT team showed up at out apartment building, broke down our neighbors door & dragged him off in cuffs, and an arsonist began burning cars on our street in the middle of the night. Previously, I've had someone steal parts of my cars 3 times -- once stealing my muffler, once stealing my rearview mirror, and once just stealing everything in my glove box -- and my downstairs neighbor once woke up to a homeless man standing naked over her bed masturbating.
--Better economy: For the price we pay for our little apartment out here, we can have a 3 bedroom house on Sunshine Canyon (a beautiful spot) in Boulder, with a garage, a fireplace and a huge deck overlooking a forest and lake.
--Better place to raise a family (I have more than one married friend who refuses to have kids until they leave LA because they wouldn't want to raise one here)
--Did mention "no traffic" yet? Seriously, this can not be over-emphasized
--For Andrea: Boulder universally listed as one of US's top 10 cities for animal-friendliness, environmental-friendliness, and organic/vegetarian food options