Random Rant & Video: Baseball vs. Football

Over at Niners Nation, Fooch wrote a post about pitchers and catchers reporting, and opening up the discussion about baseball vs. football. One guy (at least, I think he was a guy. Aw, who am I kidding? He was on a football blog, of course, he's a guy) who was new to baseball made a case in favor of football based on the oldest argument in the book -- "baseball is boring".

I responded, in long-winded fashion (as is my custom), to debate him. I thought I'd re-print it here. Because my comment was filled with misspellings and typos (as is also my custom), I've cleaned it up a bit:

Baseball's boring when you don't truly understand it.

I don’t know of anyone who’s new to baseball who doesn’t think it’s boring. Why? Because it’s a game which needs to be understood to be loved. And I don’t just mean the rules — strikes/balls, force plays, etc. — but also the ever-present strategy. What pitch will he throw? Does the hitter have the green light? Should they bunt? Is the pitcher getting tired? These are all key components experienced baseball fans are constantly thinking about during a game, often while there is no “action” on the field. It’s a game of the mind, and if you’re spending the time between each pitch bored because nothing’s happening, then it’s probably because you’re ignoring all the inherent strategy of the situation. It’s built for thinkers.

Most people love football from the moment they start watching because you don’t need to know anything to enjoy it. You can put a little kid in front of the TV and they’ll immediately take to it, because you don’t even have to know the rules to enjoy the athletic ballet of hitting, throwing, tackling, etc. You can enjoy a game even if you have no idea what a zone blitz or a pulling guard is. That doesn’t mean there isn’t a lot more a thoughtful, knowledgeable fan can pick up during a game, but it’s built for the masses to enjoy easily.

Think of it like food — every kid loves a McDonald’s hamburger, or mac and cheese, or something easy and simple like that, but it takes a more mature pallet to enjoy the nuance of something like a fine wine, or pate, or something complicated like that. That doesn’t mean those complicated things are for everybody — many adults still prefer burgers and fries to gazpacho and quail, just as many people who know both sports prefer football — but you can’t say for sure until you’re at least able to recognize the many subtleties and nuances of baseball.

For me, it might be too close to call. Football was my first love, and like many, I thought baseball was boring as a kid. But now that I feel I have a good understanding of both sports, I think they’re about equal. Of course, I love them for completely different reasons — baseball for its intricacy (the best idea for a game I know of, and also the most perfect rules (notice how they’ve barely changed in 100 years), its strategy, the razor-thin difference between a hanging slider and an unhittable one, and the fact that each side has a completely equal chance at scoring (no clock or field position to hinder their efforts). I love football for its brutality, acrobatics, and pace, its many moving parts, the race against the clock, the gladiator-like specatcle, its immense preparation necessary to succeed (game-planning, film-watching, scout teams, etc.), and the fact the athletes are so good they literally have to change major rules every year just to keep the game fair.

So that’s my long-winded way of saying: it’s a draw.

Since that wasn't very funny, please allow me to make that up to by closing with a much more entertaining take on the Baseball vs. Football debate -- the all-time classic bit by the late, great George Carlin: